Friday, December 18, 2015

A tribute to my father.

My father, Carlton W. Ulbrich, passed away on December 6, 2015.  This is the tribute I gave him at his memorial service.

When I told people that my father was dying, stories started to come out that I didn’t know or remember.  My childhood friend Kirsten said he taught her how to twirl spaghetti on a spoon.  My college friend Jackie said he insisted on framing her Masters degree for her and every time she looks at it, she remembers him.  There are so many people that have stories just like this about Dad.  He wanted no recognition for it but he touched so many lives in his 83 years on this earth.

He was also fun and funny, he was sarcastic and loved puns.   He introduced me to great comedy, taking me to see Billy Crystal and George Carlin live, introducing all of us to Saturday Night Live and David Letterman.   At one point he had all the years of Saturday night live on VHS tape so he could go back and watch classic skits any time he wanted.  He understood the importance of laughter and humor to living a happy life and it was infectious.  We all learned to love to laugh.

When I was 2 my mother discovered me in the back yard singing curse words because I had heard my father using them.  Mom told Dad to watch his language around me but I know he had to have been laughing on the inside about his toddler singing curse words.

And while he did teach me every curse word there is, he also had a lot of sayings that I still say and think about.  My two favorites were:
“Red sun at night, sailor’s delight, red sun in the morning, sailor take warning.”  - I think of him every time I see the sunset thanks to this one. 
“Parenting is not for sissies” – yeah, as a mother of 3 I can tell you that this is one of the truest things he ever told me.

Dad & I had a fun relationship when I was a teenager.  I had several years as the only child at home and there were many nights that Dad & I would be home alone.  Even then I cherished those years together because he was my Daddy and I loved him like any girl loves her Daddy.  Yes, he would sniff me when I walked by him to make sure I had showered, teaching me about personal hygiene in his own silly way, but we spent time together eating junk food while he taught me about baseball and football and computers.

As wonderful as he was as a Dad, he was just as amazing as a Grandfather.  All of his granddaughters adored their Grandpa Ulbrich. And how he loved his baby granddaughters.  He loved to hold them and be silly with him, pretending to teach them how to walk when they could barely hold up their own head.  He would do anything for his daughters and granddaughters, including being ridiculous with them if it made us laugh.

My favorite example of the extent to which he would go for us happened about 8 years ago.  My dad proudly talked for many years that he had never attended a Clemson football game, even though he had watched or listened to every Clemson game.  But when his granddaughter Caroline came to him at age 7 and said “Grandpa?  Will you take me to a Clemson football game?” he immediately bought 4 tickets to the next home game and went with 2 of his granddaughters and his son-in-law at age 75 to his one and only Clemson football game.  Clemson lost but they didn’t care.  I asked Dad what he thought and he said “it was fun but I don’t really need to do it again.”  Anything for his girls.


William Shakespeare wrote in Julius Caesar “His life was gentle, and the elements, So mixed in him that Nature might stand up, And say to all the world, 'This was a man!'  To me, this is my father.  My Dad was a gentle, loving, kind and always humble man.   I will always love him and will miss him but I was blessed with an amazing father and for that I am forever grateful.